cosmic_celery: (RAGAD: pinter pause)
Dad had the idea that Grandma would like pictures of my brother and me for her birthday, since the last ones we had taken were a couple years ago. Since we're not living in the same area anymore, we had to go somewhere where we could have similar backgrounds. So...I was packed off to the Sears Portrait studio, where I contended with possibly the most annoying women on Earth (one who felt I needed to know her entire life story) in order to get this:

For the record, the background is 'blue glitter' and the pose is 'what the hell am I doing in this position?'  )


Oh, btw, I got a haircut.

Dad's coming up this weekend to spend some time with his mom. Yesterday was her actual birthday and we went up, brought yummy cake, and spent some time with her. She's become vaguely obsessed with this band that plays on PBS sometimes called Celtic Thunder. Basically, a bunch of Irish guys, performing and singing songs. It's nice to see her really interested in something...she's been looking up information on different songs and learning more about Ireland. It's an aspect of her I haven't seen before, and it's neat to know that my grandma can be as much of a fangirl about things as I can. I got her one of the DVD's of the group for mother's day and she really loves it.

She's also been going out with people she knows more...where not too long ago it seemed like she'd decided she didn't want to do that anymore. All very encouraging.

The semester's just about over and I'm rushing to get everything done. So...I shall talk about school when I know how everything turns out.

Life update

Mar. 5th, 2010 02:55 am
cosmic_celery: (RAGAD: juggling)
So, my Grandma seems to be doing alright. I'm still pretty worried about her, but she's going to get some more information before she does anything serious and that seems like the best was to go about things.

Last week I went into the bank with a bond (that I've mentioned here before) and cashed it in. I'd been told that it could be worth around a thousand bucks, as I've had it for twenty years. It's worth a lot less than I thought it was worth. Only about a hundred and fifty bucks. But ah well.

It's already been spent. I bought a few things I'd been thinking about getting for a while: some sunglasses, a program to help me learn guitar (the thing has just been sitting around and I can't stand it), and a pretty nice little microphone. I'd been talking with my grandma about how she wants to record some of the stories about her mother and grandmother and the stories she knows from them. I figure if I had something a bit better than the built-in mic on my laptop, I could actually make that happen. So that's what I did.

So now I've got no money. A while back I applied to be a first reader for the online science fiction magazine Strange Horizons and, after almost a month, they got back to me saying that "after some discussion of your application and your comments on your favorite and least-favorite SH stories, we think this probably isn't a good match. We thought you made some good comments, but we just don't feel that our tastes and yours mesh well enough for this position." Pfft. I can't even get a non-paying job.

But I still have yet to sell any of the stuff I've set aside, and I'm really looking forward to the stuff I'm getting. I'm trying to think of alternative uses for the mic. What would you people want to hear? poetry? my writing? excruciating guitar practice and gradual improvement? I kind of hate the sound of my own voice, so maybe it'd be like immersion therapy. I don't know.

Aaaanyway. Still liking my British lit class, and still annoyed by the ineffective teacher in my mythology class, but I'm doing well in both. Self defense class was really uncomfortable the other night because he choose me as a volunteer to practice a few moves in front of the class. That is, he "attacked" while I practiced in front of everyone. This is probably partly because my mom can't really do things in the same way a young, fit person could. Also, I think he likes me. I have no idea why. He doesn't seem to like my mom at all. It's funny since she's usually the one who's great with people. I don't like him as much as the guy he has coming in to help out with demonstrations every once in a while. This guy and the teacher seem to be a bit gay together. Again, I don't know, but it's hard not to go there when one of them's straddling the other. (And no, it's not a pleasant image. Neither of them are exactly Greek gods.} Ahem...but anyway...

Had an in-class essay comparing Keats' "Ode to a Nightingale" and Shelley's "To a Skylark" and I got a 94%! Though I think he's a very easy grader with the in-class essays. The guy next to me, a complete idiot, got a B.

Next we're reading through Dickens' Hard Times. I need to read that this weekend...and I'd like to start on a book I bought called Arthur and George by Julian Barnes. It's an alternate history novel surrounding an original character and Aurthur Conan Doyle in late Victorian England. ...and the next EDA, and some art stuff. And research. Oh, and writing. I haven't done any writing. And...a bunch of other stuff.

Agh. Too much to do.
cosmic_celery: (DW: 5/Tegan the space between us)
I haven't made a proper journal entry in quite a while, it seems, apart from showing off the bits and bobs of my costumes. (As it happens, the tights for my girl!five thing showed up and they're very cool - they've got a cool cable-knit pattern on them like the sweater. See?)

There's a couple things I've been wanting to mention on here but I haven't really sat down to do it, so:

There's been some business with my grandmother that came to a rather frightening moment this weekend. We learned several months ago that she has a growth on one of her ovaries. As far as they know it's not cancerous and it could have been there a very long time before they even found it. For a while they were talking about the possibility of going in and having it removed. Initially, she agreed, but then after talking with my Dad, she agreed to reschedule to this weekend. The night before last, grandma got a ride up to the hospital to go over everything and then came home. Once at home, she got a call from one of the nurses saying that she could come back to the emergency room immediately because a test had come back showing signs of renal failure. She refused because she felt fine, and called my mom and me to tell us what had happened. It's at that point that I freaked out a bit. It seemed like nobody was caring that something potentially fatal was happening to a member of our family.

However, it turns out that the readings were perfectly normal for her based on her history (she has one kidney, which skews the results) and furthermore, she's decided not to get the surgery at all. This is largely on my Dad's influence, who is extremely suspicious of hospitals. He thinks that once you walk through the doors, you lose all ability to make decisions for yourself. That part is unfounded, definitely. The other side, which I totally understand, is that my grandmother is an 89 year old woman. Surgery to deal with something that isn't causing her discomfort is definitely a risky proposition. Still, it irks me that nobody is weighing the options.

So, she'll be making an appointment to go see a geriatric doctor...who, I suppose will look over everything - and we'll see from there.

The second thing I wanted to talk about is an incident that happened at my mom's work several months ago. A man who had been fired during the holidays came in, shot one of the management, and then himself. My mother wasn't directly involved, though she was in the building when it happened. As far as these sorts of things go, I think it qualifies as "close to home". Though I have the same sort of detachment thinking about it that I get when I've heard of any other shooting. I don't know if that's good or bad, really. People do strange and terrible things that make little sense to me, and I'll never understand that sort of thing, no matter how close to home it is. But...I'm not horrified by it. Just sad for humanity.

Hm.

Anyway. I think my dad's coming down today, which should be lovely given I as good as hung up on him the other night when he was rambling on about how surgery should have never been an option at all for my grandmother. ...and I haven't had any sleep.

Despite the tone of this entry so far, I'm alright. School is going nicely and I'm learning things I'm interested in. On Monday I'm going to go see about cashing in a bond I've got lying around - I have a list of things I'd like to do and most of them require a bit of dosh.

cosmic_celery: (DW: 5: Turlough hands)
THE HONESTY MEME

So, go be honest with me, especially if I'm constantly annoying you or something.

__

I started school today. I've been really intensely anxious this past week. I suppose it's a result of doing all my classes online last semester. I haven't really been around people I don't know in months...and now it's just completely jarring to be around so many. My first class in the morning is physics (physics phyyysics physics) which on one hand is really interesting to me. On the other hand, it seems like it's going to be tons of work and is going to involve math that I'm not entirely comfortable with. (Yes, I'm really very awful at most math.) I sat front and center which should both get me to pay attention and scare the shit out of me on a daily basis.

The other class I attended today was my Self Defense class that I'm taking with Mom. It's the same teacher that taught the T'ai Chi class, which is alright. He talked for a while today about different types of predators. A lot of it just seems common sense to me. Look around, be aware of your surroundings, most attackers are someone the victim already knows, that sort of thing. I'm not sure if Mom's going to do very well in the class because she can't really hit the pads and things without it hurting her (though he said it would be fine). Her and her Doctor have been trying to figure out a new medication to deal with her pain issues (she has rheumatoid arthritis), but the stuff they just put her on was making her feel sick, so their going to try something else.

Not sure how that's going to work out, especially since my Grandma in going in for a surgery next week. She has a big growth on one of her ovaries that they're going to go in and remove because it's causing some problems for her. The whole idea scares the shit out of me. She's tough as nails, but she's also almost 90 years old.

...And because most of my post was a bummer:

I've been on a Smiths kick this week and had the following conversation with mom:

Her: That guy has a really unique voice.
Me: It's Morrissey.
Her: ...Van Morrissey?

Tomorrow I've got my physics lab (with a different teacher than the lectures), mythology and British lit. We'll see how it goes. But...I'm signing off now as I've got to be awake in a few hours. Man, this early rising is going to take some getting used to.

cosmic_celery: (B7: Avon)
Last night I opened up a left-over fortune cookie and it had two fortunes in it! One said "A bold and dashing adventure is in your future" and the other one said "you will have good luck in your personal affairs." So, that's neat. Usually you don't even get fortunes at all, just compliments to your character like "well, aren't you nice." And I wouldn't really mind if either of those came true.

Yesterday my dad came down. We went to visit grandma, and went out for dinner. We had a good time, had some good conversation, and the people at the restaurant sang me happy birthday.
My grandma gave me some money as well as a beautiful crystal perfume bottle that had belonged to her grandmother- so it's sort of a family heirloom at this point. Both she and my dad had played with the prism-like stopper of the thing when they were kids. I'm honored to have received it, but I think I'm still touched more by the dictionary she gave me earlier in the year because I can actually use that. Also, my Dad and his wife got me a pretty TARDIS blue sapphire on a necklace, a little TARDIS pin, and a collection of old "The Fly" movies. Something to feed my love for Vincent Price!

...And they also gifted me this odd figure thing that looks like a Japanese toy version of a gangster. I don't really get it. My mom also gave me a figurine that I have absolutely no interest in: a cartoonish goth girl standing on a podium that reads "Do I look like a freakin' people person?" Yeach. I have no idea why she'd think I would like that. Mom also got me some perfume which I think we're going to take back, and she and my brother bought me a Kindle, which is definitely not going back. I haven't had much chance to play around with it yet, but it is pretty awesome. First thing I did was download Swann's Way, so maybe I'll finally start working my way though a bit of Proust.

Above all, I think I've most enjoyed everyone on here and elsewhere on the internet who's wished me a happy birthday. It's made me feel liked, and I thank all of you for the good wishes.

Today, I didn't really do anything. Slept in, and then tonight me and mom had a couple terrible margaritas while we watched an episode of Blakes 7.

Back when I talked briefly about my personality type, I listed Avon as someone who shares my type. Now that I've actually been watching the episodes, I'm really beginning to see similarities in the way we think. This thought of Avon's especially struck me because it's something that I've also wondered about:

"I have never understood why it should be necessary to become irrational in order to prove that you care. Or indeed why it should be necessary to prove it at all."

It all has me thinking that people must view me so incredibly differently from how I view myself. In public I come off as aloof and distant, and partly that's because I am aloof and distant unless I really like a person, and it's rare that I find people whom I actually like. I'm not rude to people, I just don't interact with them if I have no interest in doing so. ...and this has resulted in my mother buying me a figurine that says "Do I look like a freakin' people person?" across the bottom. I know that I'm over-analyzing it, but it almost feels like an insult.

cosmic_celery: (DW: 5 there must have been a moment)
The new squeaky chihuahua dog has ringworm. Lovely. Also, instead of the vet giving her a regime of antibiotics, she's given us this utterly awful stuff that we're supposed to wash the dog off with once a week. One of its main ingredients is sulphur, which, if you haven't had the pleasure, smells exactly like rotten eggs. And of course I have to help, even though I didn't want the dog in the first place.

And today is my brother's birthday. He's flown in for the occasion and we're going to see a movie tonight, then will probably go see our Grandma tomorrow. I'm glad to be seeing Grandma again, since I haven't been able to go see her recently, but I'm sure it'll be a birthday-centric event.

cosmic_celery: (IZ: head pidgeons)
Well, judging by how my arms and legs are still itchy and covered with tiny bumps, I'm guessing that I'm not exactly through with my mysterious allergic reaction. The last time this happened (that time I had rash all over my face) I went to the doctors and they couldn't figure out what was causing it, so they just put me on a bunch of steroids. I'm hoping it doesn't come to that, but at the same time, I wish this would just stop. Took a couple antihistamines, so hopefully I'll be able to get to sleep soon.

Today I visited my Grandma and, while mom went out grocery shopping, I read to her from the Eighth Doctor Adventure, The Deadstone Memorial. She says that she doesn't like sci-fi, and she's never seen any Who before, but she likes what I've read so far :)

cosmic_celery: (HP: Luna is a bit spacey)
I had a nice time at my Grandma's yesterday for Fourth of July. I'm not big on symbolic displays of firepower as a celebration of patriotism, but they were pretty. We watched the nearby fireworks display from the back of her place. My favorite was the one that looked like red ash flicked from the tip of a giant, invisible cigarette.

I really like my Grandma. She's an amazing woman, but tonight she totally broke my heart. We were talking about how she and I are both introverted and she talked about something her husband (who died when I was little) said to her once:

"And Pop said, 'Rosemary, I'm a loner, but you're more of a loner than I am. You're okay on your own. You don't need me.' ...I did, though."

And then we went on to talk about something else. God, but that hurts. I'm not good with emotion in general, but I understand that.

I've been pretty disjointed and detached lately, and I'm not sure exactly how to fix that. I don't really do much and I don't do anything with people besides my immediate family because I've not had friends since I left high school three years ago. Usually I'm alright with that since I'm pretty introverted. I can amuse myself and I get my dose of human interaction here and elsewhere, but sometimes it just doesn't seem like enough.

<3

Jun. 29th, 2009 12:16 am
cosmic_celery: (PD: Books are great)
Just want to show off my new (old) dictionary:

Photobucket


From the spine:

Webster's Twentieth Century Dictionary.
Unabridged.
Many Supplementary Vocabularies
and Articles with Atlas of the World
(This dictionary is not published by the original publishers
of Webster's Dictionary or their successors)

Photobucket


Very unabridged.

Photobucket


My grandmother gave it to me today. She got it in 1942, the year it was published, from a door to door salesman. She had to buy three magazines to get the dictionary, which is what she really wanted.

In the front it has pictures of soldiers, fighter planes, and the "television apparatus". In the back are histories, an atlas, names from mythology and scripture, and quite a lot more.

It is pretty much the best gift I've ever received.

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